We met Julie whilst she was shopping for lingerie for a PURR play party. What we didn’t know was that Julie had previously been diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer and attending a play party was ticking things off her bucket list that she had always wanted to do.

Julie’s unapologetic attitude to living life however the f*ck she wants is exactly what KissKill is all about. We got in touch and she was kind enough to share her inspiring story with us.

What defines sexy, and how important is sexual function?

My name is Julie Lindsay. I am 50 this month and mum to 2 teenagers. I'm a competitive bodybuilder and I compete on Aug 3rd, next month. 

I was diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic colorectal cancer in 2022 and underwent radiation, chemotherapy and surgery over 15 months.

For the last 12 months, I have been on a journey of self discovery and reinvention post cancer diagnosis and treatment, exploring these questions.

Before bowel cancer, I thought I knew what made me feel sexy and the significance of sex and intimacy in my life. It wasn't until these aspects were taken from me that I reassessed their true importance.

My radiotherapy treatment came with an unfortunate side effect - temporary sexual dysfunction. 

Like many women facing major health issues, dealing with this challenge was incredibly isolating and confronting. Adding to the difficulty, seeking help only brought more stress and confusion.

Despite the obvious importance of my sexual function to me, most of my medical team didn't seem to share my perspective. They showed zero interest in addressing my sexual health issues, dismissing them as irrelevant to my overall well-being. They were stunned at my straightforward questions about when, how, and to what extent my sexual function would be restored. It was as if sex and intimacy were no longer priorities simply because I was a cancer patient. I even heard comments like, "No one has ever raised that concern before" – WILD.

To say I had to FIGHT for health services to acknowledge and restore my sexual function would be an understatement. Me being me, this fuelled my determination to advocate not just for myself, but for all women undergoing similar treatments.

I’m happy to report that due to ongoing support and never-ending hope, I have now resumed full sexual function! 

Despite the outcome, this experience made me deeply consider the importance of a woman's sexual health in terms of function, pleasure, and her ability to fully enjoy life – something I had always assumed would just be there.

I realised that yes, I was a cancer patient, but that didn't make me less of a woman or diminish my sense of sexiness. It made me a woman who needed medical services to get back to good sexual health for a full and meaningful, well-rounded life.

Whether dealing with cancer, post-birth complications, prolapse, menopause, vaginismus, or any other medical issue causing sexual dysfunction, we do not become any less sexy, sexually worthy, or driven. We simply deserve accessible sexual health services to restore our well-being and to be listened to when we stress that sex is important to us.

Wherever you are on your sexual health journey, remember this: you are not broken – you are sexy, beautiful, and inherently deserving.